Your Vertigo 2017 editorial team answers all the terrible ice breaker questions you will be asked by your tutors for the rest of your university life. Get your cringe on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Louisa Luong, Editor-in-Chief

1. Pick something out of your pocket/purse and tell us why it’s important to you.

Crumpled receipt for a burrito from November last year, because it’s important to be reminded that your body is a temple.

2. Describe yourself in three words.

Hit or miss.

3. Name a few of your weaknesses.

Chronic lateness, inability to parallel park, and dry elbows.

4. What is the worst present you’ve received?

My mum went to Japan and bought me a pair of off-white socks for flats. I don’t own flats. It took me a while to figure out how to put them on properly.

 

 

 

5. If they made a movie of your life, which actor would you cast to play yourself?

Bill Murray.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Michael Zacharatos, Managing Editor

1. Which famous person would you like to meet?

Gianluca Vacchi. He’s like Dan Bilzerian, but a fifty-year-old, dance-loving Italian.

2. Describe yourself in three words.

Most definitely famous:

https://www.facebook.com/vergeforvertigo/videos/540371906172782/

3. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?

Panda. People will make an effort to keep me and the rest of my species alive for doing literally nothing other than being adorable. Plus, I get to spend all day carbing up on bamboo.

4. Tell us about a unique or quirky habit of yours.

Oh, I hoped I’d get a question like this. I do this really cute thing when, after being in the Vertigo office a few hours, I stand up, catch the lift down to Harris Street, walk to Central Park, get the escalator to level three, spend $10.00 on a kebab, and take it back to the Vertigo office and eat it.

5. What was the most embarrassing moment in your life?

When I agreed to send Kezia my photo to be Photoshopped into the above masterpiece.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kim Phan, Creative Director

1. If they made a movie of your life, which actor would you cast?
Lee Lin Chin as Simba in a remake of The Lion King.

2. Describe yourself in three words.
Nanny-nap enthusiast.

3. What are your pet peeves?
Get-to-know-you questionnaires.

4. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you this week?
Changing my Facebook profile picture to me as an astronaut being kissed by a pup.

5. If you were a vegetable, which vegetable would you be and why?
Broccoli. What’s more wholesome than a tiny, tiny tree?

Kezia Aria, Socio-Cultural Editor

1. What’s your hidden talent?

Being funny but not when I need it most, like right now as I answer these terrible ice-breaker questions.

2. Which planet in the solar system would you visit?

Saturn.Capricorn’s planet.

3. What is one goal you’d like to accomplish during your lifetime?

Winning an Oscar for Best Picture.

4. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

Somewhere that hasn’t been invaded or colonised by Europe… oh wait.

5. Which famous person would you like to meet?

Beyonce (see above).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Akshaya Bhutkar, Arts & Lifestyle Editor

1. If they made a movie of your life, which actor would you cast?

Princess Jasmine because, let’s be real, the movie about my life would be an animated Disney classic.

2. Describe yourself in three words.

Really, really excited.

3. If you were an ice cream flavour, which one would you be and why?

I would be rainbow-flavoured ice cream! Colourful and bright!

4. What are your pet peeves?

People who don’t use emojis.

5. What was the worst present you’ve received?

A magazine written entirely in another language, making it obvious that my parents had completely forgotten to buy me anything at all from their trip overseas until they were on their stopover in Thailand on the journey home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bec Cushway, Creative Writing Editor

1. What’s your hidden talent?

Collecting mediocre talents and passing them off as interesting personality traits.

2. What are your pet peeves?

Poltergeists.

3. Which planet in the solar system would you visit?

Gliese 581d, because there’s nothing better than spending a lot of money to travel really far away to do the exact same thing you do every day at home.

4. Describe yourself in three words.

Friendly neighbourhood pothead*.

5. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?

The unfertilised ovum of a late species of dinosaur.

*Pottery not pot. Vertigo does not condone the use of drugs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mariela PT, Poetry and Politics Editor

1. What was the worst present you’ve received?

I’ve always been pretty lucky with presents, but that’s probably because I write extensive wish lists that are updated annually. I did have an unfortunate three-year period in which one of my aunties was convinced that I loved pearls and so every birthday and Christmas, without fail, I would receive some sort of pearl jewellery. I really don’t like pearls. Never have, doubt I ever will.

2. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?

I’d like to say I would be a cheetah because dream Mariela is fast and flashy and fabulous. But honestly, it’s more likely that I would actually be something a bit wonky and confused like a flamingo.

3. What is one goal you’d like to accomplish during your lifetime?

I’ve always wanted to spend a night in IKEA. Ideally jumping on all the beds, building then eating the gingerbread house kits, and just generally having a whale of a time. Without getting caught (duh).

4. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you this week?

My eyebrows turned huge and pink and glittery for an entire night thanks to Glitta Supernova at a ‘Queer Art After Dark’ event.

5. What was the most embarrassing moment in your life?

Once in Year 10 P.E. class I slipped in the mud whilst attempting to do my job as goalie. I had mud everywhere, it happened right in front of all the Cool Boys that were super sporty, and I was mortified. I did manage to stop the ball between my knees, though, so maybe it equaled itself out?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aaron Taylor, Online Editor

1. If you were a vegetable, which vegetable would you be and why?

I’d be a zucchini because zoodles.

2. Where do you see yourself in five year’s time?

President of the United States

3. Pick something out of your pocket/purse and tell us why it’s important to you.

My phone because it is the gateway to endless entertainment.

4. What was the worst present you’ve received?

Complaining about presents makes me feel like an asshole.

5. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

I live on the edge. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Elliot Vella, VertigoTV Director

1. What is one goal you’d like to accomplish during your lifetime?

Watch Rick and Morty season 3.

2. Which planet in the solar system would you visit?

Saturn.

3. Tell us something interesting about your summer.

I had a pain in my chest, thought I was having a heart attack, freaked out and wasted way too much money on doctor’s fees over indigestion.

4. Tell us about a unique or quirky habit of yours?

I end all phone calls with “love you”.

5. Weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?

Vegan chicken. It’s not chicken, don’t address it as such.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sophie Waddington, Business & Science Editor

1. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?

Literally any hibernating land mammal.

2. Which planet in the solar system would you visit?

Uranus to witness the magnitude of dat ass.

3. Which famous person would you like to meet?

Leo DiCaprio so we can band together and save the bees.

4. What was the most embarrassing moment in your life?

Getting stuck on a mechanical bull.

5. What’s your hidden talent?

Assembling a meal out of whatever’s left in the fridge.